Potty Animal

November 4, 2012

I’ve been trying, for what seems like A LIFETIME, to update my blog.

I’ve written several new posts. None of which I finished. All of which now reside in my blog morgue.

I’m STILL trying to write a new post. For one reason, or another, I just can’t do it.

I want to beat my head against a wall (I think I’ll drink mimosas instead).

In the meantime, and because I can’t stand the thought of my blog being stagnant much longer, I’d like to exploit my friend Maren.

I warned her. I told her to stop sending me these pics. I told her if she didn’t stop, they’d end up on the blog.

She just couldn’t help herself.

She keeps sending them my way.

Maren takes pictures of herself – in restrooms – and randomly texts them to me (Lord knows who else gets them).

Lucky for me (and for Maren I suppose), she is gorgeous, even on the pot.

The photos are ridiculous, but totally tolerable (you’ll see).

Bottom line…Maren really is one-of-a-kind.

I feel like I could put her on a time-out and she would actually sit in her room until I told her she could come out and play.

She’s eternally optimistic. And those of us that aren’t…sort of want to beat the optimism out of her Kardashian-ish a$$ (her buns are truly a work of art).

She’s one of the most generous people I have ever met (which should be obvious, given what she’s willing to share – via text).

Maren can still pull off pigtails. And onesies. I bet she could even make overalls look good.

And she’s amusing. So amusing. She’s amusing like one of those cymbal-banging monkeys. You want to clap and giggle when she claps and giggles. You don’t even know why you want to do it. You don’t even realize you’re doing it once you start doing it. You just become a cymbal-banging monkey when you’re with her. She’s THAT amusing (at least I think she is).

Maren reminds me, every day, why you shouldn’t take yourself too seriously.

She has a @#$% ton of fun.

She reminds (and reassures) me that you can grow up, but you should NEVER lose your kid at heart.

Maren is one of my best friends. I bust her chops about these seriously stupid pictures, but they make me laugh so hard. They NEVER fail to put a ginormous smile on my face. I am so grateful for Maren’s lust for life. I am so grateful for each and every one of my friends. I feel more grateful for them every day. They are literally bringing me back to life. I’m not sure how I will ever be able to repay them for that.

So, without further delay, I’d like to humiliate my favorite Potty Animal, Maren…

Bizness Casual

I Gotta Feeling

Intermission

"Civilized" Savage

You Are My Sunshine

Hook & Ladder? I barely know her.

And for my final act...

P.S. I know it’s hard to believe…but I did get permission to use all of these photos.

{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }

Dee November 5, 2012 at 10:14 pm

Ok!!! Interestingly I didn’t know this about Maren!!

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Natalie Smith November 7, 2012 at 8:47 am

These are so awesome.

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Natalie November 16, 2012 at 3:27 am

Ohhhhhh Natalie. They have only gotten better since the blog post. She sent me one the other day with a spoon full of peanut butter in her mouth. She said she felt like it was “grosser to leave a spoon full of peanut butter on the counter.”

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Betsey Jennifer November 7, 2012 at 8:13 pm

Story of my life. The blog morgue part, not the toilet photos. Haha.

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Natalie November 16, 2012 at 3:25 am

Laughing. Thanks for clarifying. If the toilet photos were the story of your life…I was going to be sure to introduce you to Maren. And BLEH to writer’s block. I want to poke my eyes out with a dull eraser.

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